two hundred-tenth.

dear (k)you,

okay, so this entry will have nothing to do with you and will dabble into my real identity. but whatever, this is my place to rant anyway, and i am in major rant mode.

so, this weekend, a very prestigious event happened. every year, people literally camp out just to get inside the arena where it the competition will be held. it's especially important to me because this is the second year that my baby sister will be participating in it. 

alright, just an overview of the event: there are 8 competitors, 8 different schools (A, B, C, D, E, F, G and H). my sister is from team A and we will be directing our hate towards team B. anyway! 8 competitors, they will do their thing for 6 minutes or so, then winners will be announced.

team B performed before A, and honestly, i was scared out of my head watching them. for lack of better word, their performance was perfect in terms of execution. so, i was almost seething with anger every time they would nail their fucking moves. it's not that i didn't have faith in team A, but i was able to watch a preview of their routine, and judging from that, B was definitely stronger. plus, i didn't want to give myself too much hope. call it conditioning.

anyway, it was time for team A and i was beyond nervous. but SECONDS into the INTRODUCTION and performance, i was getting chills and goosebumps already. they were having a near perfect run of something so technical. but during the last 3 seconds, they had a major fall. which made me even more nervous, scared and sad (if it were even possible).

so come announcement of winners. they were announcing the 1st runner up, and it turned out to be team B! ps: may i interject here that their faces when they were called were overflowing with angst. after their perfect run and that final mistake from team A, they knew they were going to win it. 

BUT THEY THOUGHT WRONG AND TEAM A WON. anyway, the real root of my frustration starts now.

so these fucking shallow stupid team B supporters are now calling foul play. they're saying stupid stuff like, "they had a fall, and then they win." fucking fixated on the fact that a fall automatically rules out winning.

they failed to notice that team A had far more difficult moves than B did. and most importantly, that A had HEART.

we were talking about it today, and then it us. team B did their piece for the wrong reason. they were consumed by their desire to one up all the other competitors, to become number 1, to beat team A and to, in their own words, "take back the crown" that their dance, while perfect, was full of angst, frustration and vengeance. 

team A on the other hand, showed pure honesty. they showed their true form during their piece. from how i saw it, minus my bias, they didn't go out there to make losers of the other competitors. they didn't go out there to defend their crown. they did their run to show everybody their love for what they are doing.

and that is why they deserved to win. and that is what these other shallow assholes cannot see. which makes me FUCKING frustrated!! seriously, i know i should have class and not stoop down to their level (i don't by the way, but it's really with great big effort), but i just want to shout at them and tell them they are a bunch of shallow fuckers with no logic whatsoever.

seriously, the comments that they post all over are freaking frustrating. they sound like a bunch of fucking sour losers. in a way, i do feel sorry for them: 1) because i saw that they did put extra extra effort, they prepared and they were really really good! that they expected a win, 2) that their perfect run was still not enough to beat a run with mistakes and 3) because they are too shallow to see beyond a single fall.

fucking corrupted minds. i hope they get nightmares when they sleep! *anti-karma fly fly fly* 

ps: believe me, that works. hihi. alright. now i feel better. i can sleep.

two hundred-ninth.

dear (k)you,

oh, and just a little post script:

이 글을 읽을 수 있다면, 나에게 메시지를 써주세요.

  

i have no idea if that came out correct, but it's worth a try. 

two hundred-eighth

dear (k)you,

i just have to say that i am so friggin pissed at the rain right now! i mean, it's been raining for that past 2-3 days already, but right when it counts, (which is around this time, so that the fucking school officials can actually start to think if maybe asking students to swim to school is a bad idea), fucking rain just STOPS. from a friggin non-stop downpour to NO RAIN OR FUCKING DARK CLOUDS.

what the fuck is that? fucking school needs to get drowned in flood! I HATE SCHOOL I HATE SCHOOL I HATE SCHOOL!

MY SCHOOL AND A NUMBER OF MY PROFESSORS SHOULD DROWN IN HELL! and i am not even sorry for saying (writing) these words.

THEY SHOULD JUST ALL BUUUUURN IN HEEEELLLL! (and let me graduate already)

two hundred-seventh.

dear (k)you,

hello. it's a new month! and i'm nearly dying. NAT. whatever. so yeah, that primadonna friend i mentioned, we're back to being friends again, so things are better. but school is a bitch again. i don't even want to think about it.

but anyway, here's a funny story from today:
so we were sitting in mcdonald's (behind this crush of mine - okay i didn't really need to say that, but i wanted to), and then my friend randomly asked, if we could choose one person to "be with" (actually no, he used a different phrase, but that's not important), who would it be?

and then i immediately thought of you. not any hollywood star with abs and biceps to die for. not any guy here where i am. not my crush sitting behind me.

you.

when all is said and done, it's still you.