hundred-thirty second.

dear (k)you,

is it that time of the year again? i guess so. i read something, and then it go tme thinking...

"i never fell in love with you. i just fell."

it got me thinking about why i'm so caught up with you.

and the temporary answer my wasted brain (that should be studying, but screw it!) came up with this:

you were an excuse for everything that never went my way.

i mean really. classic example: i don't have an exciting love life. and why is that? because REALLY, i just don't have it in me to keep any guy interested for more than, what 3 seconds. but what do i keep telling myself oh? that it's because i am MEANT for you. i have this claim over you already, just because things can't go my way.

and then there's this excuse about my being unhappy because i am not where you are. but come on, honestly, i'm depressed because, this is not where i want to be. this is not what i pictured how my youth will be spent.

I DIDN'T PICTURE MYSELF TO BE STUDYING AT THE AGE OF 22. STILL.

i know i know, i should be happy, cuz studying is WAAAY better than working, but i don't like it here. nothing here is for me. and this ball and chain called school is making me waste time.

but then i blame it on you. that cuz i have to be with you, and not because i am seriously unhappy.

i'm prolly having that time of the month aren't i? yeap. i guess so.